Things I Hate More Than Joe Salley

*~*Part B*~*

           I would like to reiterate the fact that I HATE everyone at the Rochester District Court with the burning passion of 1000 (scabby, itchy & oozing) STD’s.  I want to shoot each every person that works there… No, screw that ~>  I hope each and every person there spontaneously contracts above mentioned STD’s.  After sitting in front of a court room for over an hour without any luck finding the clerk to sign in with…   I stopped some snatch in the hall and asked if she knew where I could sign in, turns out this bitch is the clerk and after some looking into the matter further tubby tells me that she has no record of me anywhere and that I need to go back downstairs and see what is going on, I do… and of course the line I need to be in is wrapped around the room almost twice.  Sweet, (Fuckers).  So I wait and they tell me I need to go sit in front of Judge A (Same Slute told me an hour and a half ago I was assigned to Judge C.)  I go upstairs again to Judge A this time, and assume I’ve completely missed my court appearance because I was sitting around the corner waiting for the wrong judge…    From this point on I actually can’t bitch tooooo much, I walked right into the conference room I was told to go to, and the slute from downstairs had already called and explained, it was pretty simple, and they FINALLY dropped the ticket for driving on a suspended license, since I do not have nor have I ever had a suspended license.  Thanks Rochester .  

Leaving that Hell my sister called me and asked me to stop at Burger King and get her lunch, no problem… right?  Wrong, nothing today can be simple… I stop and order her stuff (a Whopper w/ cheese, extra pickles, no onions, no lettuce, and no tomato, cut in half… so they hated me the min I ordered.)   The Afro Sheen junkie made me repeat the order 6 times, and remember I just left the hell that was Rochester court, not in the most pleasant mood.  I get to the window and the woman says “Thata be a dallar nine, plleze,”  …and hands me a bag of Cini-minis.  I WAS THE ONLY PERSON IN THE DRIVE THRU… ONLY PERSON @ “the BK lounge”  I Repeated my order SIX times….   How on earth does ‘a Whopper w/ cheese, extra pickles, no onions, no lettuce, and no tomato, cut in half’ SOUND LIKE ‘CINI-MINIs’?!?!?!?!?!?   Oh but wait, it gets better… I repeat my order yet again, pay and then they tell me to pull up and park…. WHO GOES THRU A DRIVE THRU AND WANTS TO PARK AND WAIT?    Honestly, if I wanted to wait ten minutes, Id have stopped for REAL food!!  So as I am sitting in my parked car waiting for my sisters stupid Whopper w/ cheese, extra pickles, no onions, no lettuce, and no tomato, cut in half (which at this point I am very sure they are at this very moment taking turns adding the special sauce to,) I'm left to ponder all the things wrong with this situation (including the fact that my sis is going to eat this “jizz-burger” in a few minutes.  And I realized how much I hate the Burger King. 

I'm going to take a nap.  I hate the world, and today, the world hates me.  You know what??  Its not even noon yet… THAT’S sucking at life.  Hope your day is better than mine, no, fuck that…. I hope your day sucks just as bad.  Then maybe we can start a club, and I can be the president because Im way cooler than you are, and Ill feel much better.   On a lighter note, I’m Supposed to be a sex writer and this, my second article, is completed with still no mention of the big S bomb…   See, when I signed up for the position I completely forgot that I haven’t actually had sex in a really (really) long time, and Im not sure I remember what exactly it is.  Im gonna think back a ways and hopefully in the next week or so ill get ya something juicy.  “Stay Classy.”

P.s. If you haven’t noticed I’m (just a little) gay, and a big fan of P.s.’s,  because  :::ding ding ding::: “smoking pot may effect the memory” and I nearly always remember something random I absolutely have to say.   It was surely something important because I’ve already forgotten it.  Damn………………    (Twenty five minutes later) I remember!!!!   This is my first attempt to write sober in a while,  sad…  but true.  So if it sucks really bad, Eat Me.     That  was worth a P.S. right?

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